Highly sensitive people and dating 18 teen sex free web chat
So, as with such couples, the following points apply. Your HSP part is a spoilsport with all its worries? It is finding novelty and satisfying your curiosity. Well, another way to look at that is that the more you, the HSP, tries these things and is successful, the less risky it will seem next time. Well, at least your life very interesting and full of adventures, which many other HSPs might envy.
It's just a kind of exploring that does not require going anywhere or taking any risks at all. And, you'll increasingly see yourself as very competent in all sorts of situations, as competent as any worldly non-HSP. Does the HSS seem to get its way too often, enjoying the support of everyone around you?
Since there's plenty of novelty and pleasure to be found without taking risks, HSPs who are also HSSs tend to do just that--enjoy safe novelty, eagerly go after pleasures that are not dangerous--and to do this pursuing more than HSPs who are not HSSs.
However, it's amazing how safe an HSP can make a risky sport, for example.
But in fact, both parts are drivers, with human concerns and strategies for getting their way.
Hence HSP/HSSs more often feel like two people in a constant argument.
And the HSS part often wins because in this culture, at least, the combination of curiosity, competitiveness (more typical of HSSs), and risk taking are all admired more than the HSP combination of traits.
Hence the HSP part often feels it has less power and is more often dominated by the HSS part.
According to this theory, if an opportunity is sensed, the Behavioral Activation System (BAS) is alerted.
These thoughts led me to comparing the HSP/HSS to a couple in which one is an HSP but not an HSS, the other is an HSS but not an HSP. Is it needing all of this down time, this boring doing nothing that keeps you from being able to join in when others are out doing new things?
As with such couples, the person with an HSP and an HSS inside has no problem with boredom, but a lot of trouble with conflict. What you don't like about the other is just the flip side of what you do like. It keeps you safe to enjoy more novelty another day. But as it processes, it discovers new insights and fresh aspects of every situation. Feel dragged into risky situations, rough new sports, travel to strange places where there's more disease and crime?
Being an HSP/HSS almost sounds like the best of all possible worlds, doesn't it? But most HSS/HSPs will tell you it's also rough going.
The Trouble With Being An HSP/HSS I have always used the analogy one HSP/HSS gave me, which was that she felt like she lived with one foot on the gas, one foot on the brake.