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He was doing business with UAE government, not the US government, and it's all secret and that I should not tell anyone.All this time I thought he was real, but when I first spoke to him on the phone before he left for Dubai, he did not sound like the gentle man that was posted in the profile picture.Question: I’ve read many of your articles and answers and I think n/c if used properly is way more powerful than you give it credit for. There is the right reason and wrong reason to use no contact, if you must use it at all.When I broke up with my girlfriend April 09 I went straight n/c for 4 months. The wrong reason is to use no contact as a strategy for getting back your ex.They get used to not having you around and that becomes their new normal. You coming back to their life interrupts the new normal, and people in general do not like uncertainty. This is just my humble opinion based on years of experience reuniting couples. I’m letting her do what she wants but I’m going back to n/c. I tell my clients: Before you do anything ask yourself: “Why am I doing this? They returned because of them – their fears, their insecurities, their issues.It’s also wrong for you trying to get your ex back because what you are doing is shutting all the doors, windows, vents, chimneys (all access your ex would use to get to you), and then sitting by the door and checking the windows and vents hoping that your ex will burst open and come begging you to take him/her back. My experience over the years is that when someone says “I had to do no contact”, they are telling me their situation is most likely hopeless.

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It may even make them realize they’re better off without you. So before you go “no contact” ask yourself the important question, “How do my actions right now help/hurt me later?

What it does instead is create anxiety, distrust and power-play.

Things that not only hurt your chances of getting back together, but damage your relationship. Do a Google search and see how many people actually heard from their ex, how many of those got their ex back, and how many of those sustained the reunion beyond a few weeks/months.

Sounded very genuine, a Christian, wealthy, made a lot of money doing real estate and working for an oil company, and he has been working for himself for many years with his company. We texted for about 2 weeks, and he went to Alaska to finish his biggest project that he was waiting for all his life, setting up an oil rig for the government, (he made it sound like he was doing it for the US government) and he was going to make 6.5 million with this project.

This was around Thanksgiving time, and said he was going to fly down to CA from Alaska as soon as he finish his project.

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